Marriages should come with a rulebook. And, that rulebook should specify a husband’s tool limit.
by Carrie Crain (housewife extraordinaire)
For example, owning one Kobalt 29-piece Double Drive Screwdriver set from Lowes is acceptable. Owning two sets, not acceptable. Owning one Husky tool chest is acceptable. Owning an entire wall of them, not acceptable. Whether fixing a loose cabinet door, or prying a lid off of a stubborn pickle jar, let’s face it, a flathead or Phillips screwdriver can be a wife’s best friend. But, sometimes these “best friends” become intrusive, and a wife must put her Jimmy Choo stiletto down.
Case in point. My husband’s screwdrivers are meticulously displayed in his Husky tool chest. The tool chest is in the garage near a power saw he’s never used and a bicycle he’s never ridden. Nearby is a workbench. On that workbench, I counted forty-nine screwdrivers in various colors and sizes spread out on a grease-stained towel. These tools weren’t serving any purpose except taking up valuable space.
Apparently, some husbands have conveniently forgotten that some wives may need to use that garage workbench for something really important like polishing golf clubs, or repotting a plant.
The other day, I found a screwdriver with a rubber handle in the Samsung refrigerator. The Stubby Phillips was jammed between a tub of cream cheese and a pint of molded strawberries. Really? Is this necessary? There seems to be a flathead outbreak going on in my house because there’s one in every room. I honestly don’t understand why my husband needs so many screwdrivers. It’s not like he’s a handyman. Oh sure, he stained the garage floor, but that doesn’t count. Marriages should come with a rulebook.
HUSBANDS, DO NOT WATCH THIS VIDEO:
CARRIE CRAIN is a housewife extraordinaire who has bipolar, comedian, dork. She is a soon-to-be-published author of a zany, adventurous children’s novella. www.wildcatswife.com EMAIL CARRIE CRAIN | FACEBOOK | TWITTER | OTHER POSTS BY THIS AUTHOR
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