Crazytown

KINDNESS

Courtesy and thoughtfulness, even the simplest gesture of humanity, can make the whole world seem good again.
-By Leah Bonnema (Stand Up Comic) 

It was one of those days where everything was going wrong. I was running late to a spot because I'd spent obscene hours trying to get a claim processed through my insurance and as I darted down the subway stairs I remembered it was the day my weekly MTA pass expired. 

My train station no longer has an attendant so I walked up to the first of three machines to purchase a new MTA pass for the week. I soon found out that the vending machine was no longer accepting credit cards, debit cards OR bills. It was only accepting COINS. Now being that I did not have $30 in change on me I moved to the next machine. At this point I hear the loud speaker announce that my train was here, It's ok I tell myself There are more trains..

ROCKSTAHHHHHHH MOMS

In honor of Mother's Day (get to the Post Office y'all) I'd like to take a moment to recognize all the great moms out there and particularly my mom who I appreciate more than any Hallmark card can sum up.
-By Leah Bonnema (Stand Up Comic)

Those of you who know me personally, have been following Crazytown for a while or saw my show "Wake Up and Yell at Me" know that I almost lost my mom a few years back in a horrific car accident. Since getting what I consider to be a second chance, I make sure to be grateful for any time we get to spend together or even talk on the phone. Just knowing she is there I feel so lucky.

I remind myself of this when I'm upset about things that are trivial in comparison to having people in my life that love me and I love back. So Sunday, ideally every day, even though it might seem hack or cliche, let people know how much they mean to you. It is everything. 

Here are just a few of the things I love about my mom in no particular order:

• She will wax paper anything. 
• She and my father are artists and have been working for themselves for over 40 years. It's inspiring.
• She can find a way to bring poop into any conversation.
• She dressed me up as Rosie the Riveter when I was a kid, because, suffrage. 

• She has more compassion for humanity than anyone I have ever met.
• She talks through movies, creating her own soundtrack of "What" "Where do we know that person from" and a noise she makes with her lips when she doesn't approve. (And even though I'm always saying "Come on ma" I totally do it too.)

ODE TO AN ICED COFFEE

One of my favorite 'simple' pleasures in life is iced coffee. Please allow me this moment to express my love.
-By Leah Bonnema (Stand Up Comic) 

In honor of May I'd like to celebrate with an ode to one of my spring/summer delights, iced coffee.

10 THINGS NOT TO SAY TO A COMIC

A few of the most common comments that should be filed under the 'Keep That To Yourself' column.
-By Leah Bonnema (Stand Up Comic)

In general I believe people mean well. And I should be so lucky that anyone was interested in talking to me at all or listening to my stand up. BUT... I get the idea that people don't realize comedy is also a job. And that that job entails putting very personal things out into the world. AND that people have spent years working on a single joke. AND also that coming up to someone and saying something mean isn't funny. The below lists of comedy-don't does not include heckling, that is a whole entire list until itself.

BRAIN IN SLOW MO - SIDE EFFECTS OF GETTING CABLE?

For the past couple of weeks (errr, months) I've had a lot of trouble motivating, coming up with new ideas, finishing projects, doing taxes taxes taxes and anything that involves changing out of sweatpants. This just happens to coincide with the amount of time we've had cable. Related?

By Leah Bonnema (Stand Up Comic) 

January through March are never easy months, at least for me. They are the hibernation months, full of hangnails, comfort food and pajama bottoms. You go in ready to make changes and excited for the future on New Year's Eve and you emerge too big to fit into your summer clothes on an oddly hot day in April. Yesterday I contemplated a Kickstarter for lipo. 

This Ultimate Brain Suck

VILLAIN THIS

Most of my favorite movie roles are villains. It's not even that I love to hate them, I just love them. Here are a few of my top 'so bad they are so good' characters. 
By Leah Bonnema (Stand Up Comic) 

When I was just a young lass, watching Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves with my dad, I fell madly in crush with the Guy of Gisborne, played by the raspy voiced Michael Wincott (he also played a very bad bad man in The Crow). My dad said to me "You always seem to like the bad guys Leah" - and to this day, it is true. 

Give Me Brown Eyes & An Anger Management Problem & I'm In!

Below is a list of six of my top movie baddies NOT my all time top six because I reserve the right to have rotating favorites. Also, I'm not including superhero movie villains because that should be a group unto itself. AND I'm not listing iconic roles such as Darth Vader because that's a different category as well as those characters exist outside and beyond the actor's who brought them to life. 

The Pill Scene. Complete Psycho. Absolute Wonderful.

• Gary Oldman as Stansfield in Leon: The Professional. I haven't said 'Everyone' since seeing this movie without Oldman's voice ringing in my ears. (Sidenote: I was stuck between picking Stansfield and Oldman as Drexl in True Romance - also a gem!)
• Alan Rickman as Hans Gruber in Die Hard. Rickman brings some Shakespearean gravitas to this action classic. 
• Willem Dafoe as Bobby Peru in Wild at Heart. Have you seen the teeth? He oozes creepy and yet I just cannot get enough. 

KEEPING ABREAST

Once a quarter(ish) I like to update you amazing Crazytowners about what's new in Bonnemaville (ugh, I can't believe I just wrote that)...
-By Leah Bonnema (Stand Up Comic) 

First and foremost, I'd like to say thank you all so very much for support, reposts and responses. I appreciate your tweets, coming to shows and compliments (who me like compliments, noooooo). It has been a very exciting couple of months. Here are a few highlights from the Bonnema comedy burner (ugh, I can't believe I just said that)...

I am co-hosting a new show at The Creek and The Cave with comedian Tim Warner called Modern Day Philosophers. Our debut show will be Thursday April 4th at 8pm (and every first Thursday of the month after that). Come out! It's sure to be a fanfuckingtastic time!

That's my record collection in the background...

I'm very excited to be one of the featured talking heads on VH1s 100 Sexiest Artists (you can catch me in Ep 1, 2, 4 & 5) that just came out this month. 100 Child Stars came out in December and we had flying hotdogs as the background = fun! 

The weenies make my hair look red

I had a great time acting in "The Cat Adoption" if you have a moment to check it out on Funny or Die and give us a thumbs up that would be beyond lovely. I very much enjoyed being perky.

The Cat Adoption - watch more funny videos  

HOT YOGA: STREAMING THOUGHTS & SWEAT

Working out regularly is more a battle of the mind than a battle of the body. The longer you wait the harder it is to convince yourself to just put on your gym clothes and get out the door on the daily. Here is a little snippet of the thoughts running through my mind as I started back at hot yoga class.
By Leah Bonnema 

You're here... The hard part is over. You got here. You did it. You are back in business. You'll start feeling better immediately. Tomorrow will be so much easier. Good for you...

The people at the front desk are not looking at you weird. You don't have to make up a story about why you haven't been here... That's lying and bad karma, no one is thinking about you; they have their own things going on. Just tell them you were locked in a basement. 

Well I made it right so I could actually leave now. Baby steps, tomorrow I'll stay for the class. I mean I do other kinds of working out right? I've gone swimming. I go for an hour walk at least three times a week. Sometimes I even use the stairmaster. Are you really saying this?! Are you even buying your own bullshit? A walk?! Come on. Just go to the room. Get in the hotbox kid. 

CLIPS AND SALSA

Here are a few sketches, clips and otherwise NYC comedy related videos on the internet that if you have not seen already this is your opportunity.
- By Leah Bonnema  (Stand Up Comic)

Laughter is necessary. I hope the below clips bring you smiles a plenty.

One of my favorite stand up comics, Selena Coppock, has a book coming out, The New Rules for Blondes. Pre-order it here, come to the book release party at Littlefield on Tuesday April 23rd and check out this awesome trailer! 

 

MAKING LISTS JUST FOR FUN

When things get busy (thankfully) I make lists to keep me sane(ish). Here are some feel goods, to shake up the regular 'ole to-do list. 
-By Leah Bonnema (Stand Up Comic) 

A Few Fun Foods:

Queso Love

1. Chips and any kind of dip. My favorites are salsa, queso and guacamole. Hummus, of course is a stand alone dip. Artichoke or an onion, very nice as well.
2. Tom Yum Soup, it even sounds fun, and is always is a good move if you feel like you might get sick. 
3. Cadbury Creme Eggs. 'Tis the season, my teeth are already hurting.
4. Plain Greek Yogurt and then throw in some fruit. Preferably blueberries, they are my favorite color and are great antioxidants. But I'm sure raspberries or a little peach, maybe a strawberry or two, are fanfuckintastic.
5. Blue Diamond Almonds - Wasabi and Soy Sauce. 

Dive into this 'lil bit of heaven!